Slip Sliding Away

Well, I'm back!

It's been well over two busy years but it only takes one major injury to interrupt my busy life and suddenly......ample time to blog!

I am going to start with a post accident story.  Perhaps tomorrow I will fill you all in on the events leading up this this.  We'll see.

This evening was supposed to be a family affair making dinner.  My specialty is Schnitzel which the son only just learned but had not yet mastered.  No problem I say, we'll do this together.   The hubby will assist when needed.

Now, to set this story up I do have to submit just a bit of background information.  I seriously broke my foot (Tarsis bone, supposedly the worst) resulting in surgery, bruised ribs and some whiplash.  Go big or go home.  My foot is fitted with an air cast, my home with many accessaries to make my non weight bearing life easier: wheelchair, walker, crutches etc.

Enough of that.  5:30 rolls around and momma bear is getting very hungry.  No one has even made an attempt to start dinner and believe you me, no one in the house, other than myself, is even capable of pulling off a decent meal in under a half hour.  I decide to motivate.

Note to self.  Ranting is not the recommended method of motivation.  But rant I do.

One flustered teen rushes in and frantically attempts to execute my barking orders. The hubby wanders in about 15 minutes later and orders me out of the kitchen.  What if you fall, you'll screw up your foot.  No, I shout.  I'm at least getting this to the point where it's not going to take both of you an  hour and a half to get dinner on the table.  I'm starving!

I achieve my goal and set them up to finish off frying the schnitzel.  Good Lord, how hard is it to heat up oil??  The oil is smoking, I say from my perch in the living room.  No it's not says the hubby and proceeds to throw "a tiny bit" of water into the pans.....yes, you heard correctly....water!

The oil was indeed hot enough as the spitting, sizzling pans can attest to.  At this point the hubby notices his mistake takes the pans, lifts them up and proceeds to stand in the middle of the kitchen, one frying pan in both hands letting them cool.

In it's normal state my oxycodone free brain would have said, Wow, what a mess you are making in the kitchen, proceed with caution.

But no.  My drugged, low blood sugar, starving [did I say I was starving] brain lost all sensibility and madly crutched it's way into the disaster zone.  That is when tragedy struck. This is the part where the story gets good.

Remember when I told you the hubby stood with spitting frying parts in hand?  Any cooks out there?  Can you guess  what happened? (Think oil slick over linoleum floor)  You guessed it.  Three crutch strides in and I was going down for the count.  There was no stopping me.  Not even my galant hubby who tried to catch me.  Here's where I will switch to my son's rendition as he had the best vantage point:

First I saw you go flying.  I saw you protecting your foot and that you were going down slow.  I wasn't worried till your crutch knocked dads feet out from under him.  He was going down hard! And then there was Popcorn (our 7lb lap dog)!   I never realized how fast she was mom!!  She flew under your butt.....you just missed her!!!  And then dad just about landed on top of her!!! I mean, she was fast!!!

The good news is I did not further injure my foot.  I did re-strain the rib muscles on the way down but the hubby (who has been a pretty darn good caregiver) was thankfully uninjured.

And I have learned never to cook with oil whilst on crutches.

And not to rant.....that's not effective either.

😳

Double Header

The hubby and I went out hunting yesterday and each came home with a deer.  Normally this would result in great rejoicing, but in this case, not even a photo was taken.  Let me explain.

We were driving along when I noticed a deer with horns.  Seemed like a nice size, at least a 2 point (which was going to be my minimum for this year) so I took the shot.  All of a sudden there is some more movement and I tell the hubby there is another one.  Oh, I say, it's a spike buck....pretty small.  I am sent to park the truck. On the way back I hear another shot.  Did you have to shoot mine a 2nd time?  Nope I shot the other one.

We traipse through the slash about 100 meters or so to retrieve them both.  I am sent back to the truck to get the licenses.......a particular detail we both forgot to remember.  The hubby stays to gut the deer.  By the time I return the gruesome task is done (one I am capable of but will not argue should someone offer to do it for me).  What took you so long he says?

I would make a horrible deer.  I seem to take the most difficult path there and back each and every time.  Instead of looking for the "well worn" trail out, I opt for the hummocky, slashy, salal  ridden path.  Each and every time!  I am new at this....I am still learning.

We drag them out, I following the husband who has this walking through the woods thing down to a science.  In the truck they go and home we ride. No photos taken....I am kind of embarrassed as, in my opinion, these are the kind of deer you shoot at the end of the season when you still have a tag left.

Later that evening we assess the days events.  It goes something like this:

Me:  I really thought those horns were bigger.  If I had known that I don't think I would have taken the shot, would you?
Hubby:  Yup!
Me:  Really!?  Hmmmmm.  For sure though if you had taken the shot first I would never have shot that little spike buck.
Hubby:  Really!?
Me: Yup!  Why did you shoot it?
Hubby:  Because you shot one!

And so the years "competition" begins!

GermanG

Facebook "don'ts"

I have noticed that not all people know what to do regarding their status updates whilst utilizing Facebook.  Let me help you.

10 Facebook status "do nots":

1. Do not emotionally vomit all over facebook
2. Do not retaliate against your Ex
3. Do not tell me how many centimeters you are dilated
4. Do not tell me whose driveway you are parked in (or any other mundane fact)
5. Do not tell me that you have not "gotten any" in the last while
6. Likewise do not tell me that you "got it" last night
7. Do not share that you have bad gas, diarrhea or any other body fluid illness
8. Do not tell me what you are having for dinner (wait that is a mundane fact covered under 4)
9. Do not tell me that your toddler son/daughter just did a number two on the potty! (Not everyone will rejoice with you on Juniors accomplishments)
10. Never, ever, EVER update your status while intoxicated! EVER!

I am certain there are many more......but this is a start.

You're welcome,
GermanG

P90X - End of week one

Well, I survived week one.  Completely unmotivated and encouraged by my usually unenthusiastic bff, I made it to the end of the week.

I have not lost a single pound (must eat better this week), am in pain, but I feel much better.  Oh water on the knee....I have that too (insert sympathy here) but, I am taking Tony's advice, modifying, adapting and pressing on. (All with good form I might add because that is important!) See, I don't just complain the whole way through, I listen.  Well, actually, I don't really need to listen as I have probably memorized each and every annoying saying, motivational tip and just outright ridiculous ramblings.  "I recommend foot spray."  Need I say more.

Yoga X.  I truly hate it.  Yoga is supposed to be relaxing.  Not with Tony chattering on and on.  Not to mention the crazy, endless sun salutations!  1.5 hours of hell.....well maybe not all of it.  The last 5 minutes of stretching is quite relaxing.  I would rather do 2 back to back cycles of Plyometrics than one Yoga X.  Enough said.

But, I am grateful to the best friend.  Somewhat sore, but rather more motivated than the first week.  I am certain that we will eventually exchange roles and go back to our usual "Let's do this!! God you are so annoying!!" relationship, where I am the enthusiastic one.  My prediction is this will happen post wedding that she is attending.  When she is no longer on public display and can hide under layers of winter wear.  I will be the one saying, "Don't you feel great?" And she will be the one saying, "Piss off!"

I love our relationship!

GermandG

P90X - "I love it, but I hate it"

Oh the pain of "fitness".

Once again, I have lept onto the fitness treadmill thanks to my bff.  I wanted to leap on, but couldn't quite do it on my own.  Thankfully, while I was in Germany aquiring a few extra pounds, J got abducted by Aliens who transferred my desire (well, perhaps not transferred as I had lost that desire) to start on another cycle of P90X.  Now it's J saying, "When do you want to work out??"  Strange really.

Today is day 2.  Today happens also to be pain filled.  Why does "fitness" hurt so much.  It is supposed to make you feel better......this doesn't feel better.

But, from previous experience I know it will get better.  I know that I will begin to feel stronger, look stronger and become healthier.  I will lose weight.  A pleasant side effect to working out.

This time, I hope I continue in some form.  I hate struggling with my weight.  I don't like the fitness hamster wheel that I continually find myself on.

Perhaps this time, it might become a lifestyle change.

GermanG

Water, cool clean water!

Water is something that North Americans take for granted.  I have especially realized this on my trip to Europe.

I have to say miss tap water!  In Germany when you go out to eat and ask for water, you get a bottle of it, usually sparkling and you have to pay for it.  You can ask for tap water.......but you don't usually get it, or you have to fight to get some. I am told that if you insist they must give it to you but it is something that is frowned upon and if you are a frugal travellor it is something that adds Euros to your eating bill each an every time you go out.  I figure if I am going to pay 1,90€ for a glass of sparkling water, then I am going to jack it up to 2,90€ and have a decent glass of beer!

Europeans have to pay for their water.  They shower and rarely bath. When they shower they get wet, turn the tap off, lather up and clean necessary body parts, then turn the water back on to rinse off.  It's actually not a bad idea in the environmentally conscious society we live in!  But, we don't.  We waste the water standing under it for hours or bathing in it each and every day.  I confess....I have missed my nightly baths!

So, when I return to Canada I am going to try a little harder not take the water for granted and enjoy each and every free glass I drink.  I'll conserve in the shower and perhaps take a few less baths a week.

When you stop and think about it, saving the earth is best done one person at a time.  If each and every person recycled, used less water or walked a little more, the earth would be a greener place

I'll do my part.......what will you do?

GermanG

A healthy self image

Germans truly have a healthy self image.

Today was Schwimbad day.  The weather was hot, the sun was shining so off to the Freibad (outdoor pool) we go!

Here I am fretting the whole way there. Should I wear my two piece or my one piece?  I have just spent nearly 2 weeks in the land of chocolate, cheese, sausages and beer!  Needless to say, it's showing around the midline just a tad.  :P  But, on the way I make a decision.  I am on vacation dammit!  AND...no one knows me here.  I shall wear the 2 piece!

Out of the changing room I walk, full of a loathing self image and trepidation only to come face to face with a women in her late 60's....shall we say looking "well fed"....wearing a two piece!  Ha!  Can we say absolute freedom!

Now, there are positives and negatives. Also lounging about was a rather rotund man in his 40's wearing a speedo!  More than and eyefull I can tell you!  But also walking about were people of various shapes and sizes.  No one was staring (except perhaps me).....no one was commenting.  It was such a beautiful thing to see coming from a body conscious society such as mine.  Really, what is the big deal??  We are who we are, made how we are made and we should embrace it and strut around proudly.

Today the sun was shining on my being......and IN my being!

GermanG

Best story EVER!

Ok.  So there is the best story ever transpiring here in Germany.  It's about Yvonne the cow who escaped from the slaughterhouse of a sausage maker.  She wants to be free.  She wants to be wild....she wants to live.

Off she went and is now wondering through the German forest pretending to be a deer.  Many attempts have been made to catch her.  None successful thus far.

They built her a beautiful pen with lovely hay and grain to eat.  She would have none of that.  The freedom of the forest and munching on grass wherever she wishes is what she craves.  Recently though a 2nd attempt to catch her was made.  One which I find particularily amusing.

They brought her a bull.  LOL  I am laughing as I find this very amusing.  The idea came from none other than a man and they were darn proud of the idea too!  They went on and on how attractive he was, gentle....alluring.  Only a man could have thought of this idea.  Think about it.  Were it the other way around I am certain that the cow would attract a rougue bull. BUT....since it is a cow that has gone "ferrel" I am certain it will NOT work. And to make matters worse, they have recently found out that the bull had been castrated.  I just about fell off the chair laughing.

So, each evening we watch the news to see how Yvonne is doing.  Rooting for the cow....that she gets to stay in the wilderness.  At the moment there are animal control officers trying to dart her as they are concerned she will wander into traffic and seriously injure a motorist.  I think she is too smart for that.  When people are searching for her she stays one step ahead of them and then pops up behind them as if to say, "I´m too smart for you.  You will never catch me!"

Personally......I am cheering for the cow!

GermanG

Damn cheese!

It's the cheese....I swear it is.  May as well tape it stright to my butt!

I have clothing, lovinly selected especially for my trip to Germany.  Now, the perfect opportunity arises....I put them on and Gah!  Too tight.

Is it any wonder really??  All the food I have eaten....especially the cheese.  Which, by the way, tastes NOTHING like what is available back home.  I try each and every meal to stay away....but alas, it calls me....beckons me to be placed atop splended fresh baked bread.  Thankfully I have managed to stay away from adding butter........that would be utter catastrophe!!

I still have a week to go.  Will anything fit at the end of this vacation???

Probably only the Yoga pants.  I wonder if it's possible to lose not only the weight I have gained but also the extra I came with in the mere 7 days that remain.

Probably not......sigh......damn cheese!

GermanG

You get what you pay for!

Bought a cute little camera to take wiht me to Germany.  Sweat little deal.......$100. I have a great camera but it's rather bulky so I thought this would be perfect!

Fast forward to trip to Germany, good camera at home, new camera in hand.

There is a perfect photo opportunity.  Press the button....nothing.  Press again....still nothing.....press again......butterfly gone, lovely leaf picture!  Gah!

Next opportunity.  Running for a train......no time to stop....oh look at the beautiful castle.  Press the button....nothing....press again....nothing....press again.....still nothing......meanwhile relatives are now 1 klm ahead of me running for said train.

Earlier in the day we were taking a relaxing ride on a boat.  Wanted to take a few shots, all to no avail.  To backtrack just a bit, there was a sign that read look but do not feed, with various pictures of carp, ducks, turtes, etc.  Now I must say that for no feeding allowed, these creatures all arrived at the side of the boat, mouth open waiting.  Obviously someone is feeding them!  I try to take a few pictures.......stupid camera!  Perhaps that large carp with the wide open mouth might enjoy eating this piece of crap!  By the way....Germans know the word shit.....which I said often when the camera failed.......always followed by snickers from my cousin.

Anyhow, I have learned that you get what you pay for.  I have purchased what seems to be the version of a modern day pinhole camera!  (Grainy black and white photos to follow!)

German G

Coming home

It seems that when you travel there are many things that are similar......and yet many that are not.

Relationships for instance are the same worldwide.  Couples argue about the dumbest things all over the world.  Take my cousins.  Apparently her hubby does little around the house.  A common theme throughout the globe, of that I am certain.  Then later.....she puts her foot down......clean up after yourself she says......only to be agrivated by the mess that still remains and she once again starts picking up the left over dishes, munchie bags, laundry, etc.

The weather.  Crap here....crap at home......I have been wearing the same ONE pair of long pants that I have packed.....enough said!

But the differences.........

Food.  Everything tastes better in Germany.  It even looks better.  Glorious pretzels for sale with lights beaming on them, beckoning you to have one with a "Milsch Kaffee".  Heaven!

Prices of things are outrageously cheap.  High quality too.  I am seriously considering selling my house (must first entertain the nothing with hubby THEN try to convince him of said notion) and moving over here.  Groceries that I can purchase in Canada sold here so much more cheaper that it longer holds any credence with me when people say I pay more for groceries due to transportation costs!  Hogwash!

And fashion.......Europeon people are so much more stylish than their Canadian counterparts.  I know why people point and laugh at then when they visit....they are jealous that they don't know how to look that good......or even care if they do.....I do!

I know that nowhere is perfect.  But for me, unfettered by responsibilites.......this place is.  :-)

For me, it's like coming home......

GermanG

They sure do move!

I am currently on vacation.  I have also made an observation while I am here.  Europeans sure do move!  Not just in vehicles, but on trains, bikes and walking.  I find they are especially physically minded.

Now, having said that I made the most interesting discovery that would be sure to have even my bff's bf running to the swimming pool!  What is it you ask??  Beer is served in the cafe that is housed within the swimming pool.  And schnitzel!  And good beer, too!

Germans are a wonderful people.  They live well, play well and as a result eat well.  I understand why this is my motherland.  There is a kinship here.  :-)

Jetlag and rain aside, I am enjoying my vacation.  Even as I type this I am rewarded with a view from the window of glorious sunshine.  This afternoon holds a "fest" in the days activities.....more beer, food and fun!

Sigh.....it's going to be another good day!

GermanG

What........you're going on vacation??

People are rude! 

I am going on vacation and you would think that the world has ended.  A factoid that I did not seem to know about was that people who own businesses are NEVER to go on vacation and ALWAYS be available for the general public.....always!  (Thank you for letting me know this)  Just kidding!!!

Do not let me know this!  Do not snap at me when you phone......if you want good customer service (or even want me to return your call when I get back)......do NOT be rude to me! 

Being in business gives one flexibility.  I can choose my vacations, but contrary to some people's belief, I do not just pick and choose at a whim.  I work hard before I go and I work hard when I get back.  Somewhere in there I have to make up the time off and being that I am the only "employee" of the company, it falls to me to do that.  It's probably why many business owners think twice before they take a vacation.......it's a lot of work!

But, thankfully, I have approx 8 more days of fielding phone calls before I leave.  I will not have telephone service when I get there and limited email access, so I can truly say that I will be on vacation.  Something much needed and I am looking forward to it.

And my customers......I am pretty sure they will still be there when I return........if I return.  LOL

GermanG

Meloncholy muse

Melancholy: Depression of spirits; a gloomy state continuing a considerable time; deep dejection; gloominess.

I am in a melancholy state.   Is it the weather.....the lack of sunshine one should find in the months of "summer"....perhaps. Is it because my vacation is only 2 weeks away and instead of shedding the five pounds I had planned to I have gained five more? Could very well be!

Whatever the reason my melancholy mood will remain hidden from the rest of the world.  Why?  Because that is what I do. Stemming mostly from  being a private person where that area of my life is concerned.  Few people know me well enough to see through the "everything's great"!  Few of us (I am equally guilty) stop long enough to have a second look and see what is really swirling behind a person's comment.  We rarely glance twice as we whiz by asking, "How are you?"  Few of us listen well enough to hear when someone is saying they are not.  Again...I am just as (perhaps abundantly so) guilty as the next person.

But really, what is there to say when some problems cannot be fixed and you simply don't feel like telling the whole world.  I have never been that person to emotionally vomit all over someone else.  I like to be there for my friends, but don't have the patience for people who get "stuck"....mired down in things they don't even want to fix.  I don't expect it from others.

And so, the weather suits my mood.  It is melancholy......as am I.  And that is ok with me.

Besides......my trip to Germany (all alone) is just around the corner and sure to lift any mood I am in!

GermanG

Do we really need to legislate that??

How come cigarettes get picked on by the Canadian government?  It's their "glamour" indulgence if you will, that legislates tobacco manufacturers to post those nasty images on a package of smokes to "deter" a person from having a puff. 

First off I would like to say that I call myself a non-smoker but do enjoy a cigarette now and then, especially in the summer months.  I do not struggle with addiction in this area.  Food is my indulgence.  The photos on the package do not deter me.....nor my husband who is a hard core smoker.  Nor does the price, or even the social stigma attached to it.  Pass by someone enjoying a pipe or cigar and people will smile.  Pass by a smoker....disgust!

Now, what I am trying to get at is this......why do they pick on cigarettes, when it's clearly a persons choice that dictates their decision to smoke?  There are a plethora of items that are unhealthy.....why no disgusting photos on them???

Indulge me on this........

-All junk food should have pictures of obese people, enlarged hearts, mounds of fat......any number of things.....plastered on the bags. I mean, if they think it will work for cigarettes.....just saying.

-Alcohol....how about photos of car wrecks, torn limbs, wheelchairs, etc.

-Condoms should have photos of children weeping when families are torn apart from adultery, pictures of gonorrhea, syphilis or a person with aids. Or pregnant people...THAT"S a deterrent!

This list could go on and on.  My point is this.  We all have something called free will.  We can choose to do something, or choose not to do it.  And many who are addicted to cigarettes will not quit no matter how much we nag or legislate them to do so. 

Unless......you would make them pay for their own medical bills.  I know it would work for me.  If I got heart disease due to me constantly shoveling food in when I am not hungry, I just might re-think my motives.  Hit me in the pocket book and perhaps...just perhaps....I might not eat so much.

But we all know that will never happen.  Just as making manufacturers of cigarettes plaster nasty photos on a package of smokes shouldn't happen either.  Don't single them out unless you are going to target every other indulgence that will lead to health issues.

In my opinion.....that is discrimination!

GermanG

The week the Women went

I saw a show yesterday called "The week the women went".  It was highly entertaining though I found it extremely difficult to relate to some of the women.

First off, some of the women were crying BEFORE the even left, saying how much they would miss the kids!!  What is the matter with you!!??  They were sent to Banff at a 5 star resort to be pampered all week!!  Not something you cry over unless it's tears of joy! And when they returned the tears came again.....hardly waiting to see the kids (funny none of them said the husband).  Ok...I admit....I would be crying a bit, but only because I would be fearful of the state of the house and how much work would be waiting for me at home!

It was an eye opener for most of the men.  Surprise....we really don't sit around all day eating ice cream and watching soap operas.  Especially if we have young children.  If we have older children we multi-task and eat our ice cream in a cone, in the car....on the way to the soccer game!

Most of the men found it exhausting to work and look after the kids.  Those with older teens often pawned the younger ones off to them while they got in a round of golf.  Typical.  When I go away, it is not uncommon to phone home only to find out that our son has been shuffled off to the neighbours while the hubby "relaxes". Wait...did I say relax??  What I meant to say was "tidy up the garage", which is code for sleep on the couch all afternoon and then go to the garage for about a half hour so that technically, it's not lying. He did actually "tidy" the garage.  :P

One particularly annoying fellow on the show (a live in boyfriend) was not even present when his girlfriend returned.  He was golfing with his buddy and when interviewed later asked if he was supposed to have learned something from the experience?  I sure hope she did......leave him!

I guess I am just a horrible wife.  I don't miss the kids and I don't miss the husband.  I enjoy myself while I am away.  They will survive and perhaps even come out the other side a bit more independent......like their mom.  And when they get older, I (by my example) will have made it easier for them to leave their families guilt free. 

Sometimes it's tough being a mom.......but someone's got to do it!  :-)

Death & taxes....both are certain

Ahhhhhhhh, the HST referendum.  Should we say yes to keeping it, or no & scrap it? (Or is it no to keeping it and yes to scrapping it??)  As my best friend said......the only thing harder than figuring out which box to check is the order of the envelopes (3 in total) in which you have to stuff your ballot into!

We still have to pay taxes.  That point is certain.

I read a particularly great blog on the subject where the author (click for link here) brings up some pretty strong points. One of which is, and I quote:  "Just because the government forced HST upon us, doesn't mean we need to vote it away". Well said!

Let's face it.  No one likes the way the Liberals forced the HST down our throats.  We were never consulted and we never had a chance to voice our opinions otherwise.  Until now.  Which I am afraid, is a bit too late, as it now swings the power to the influential fear mongers who will tell people that this is a horrible tax and it's going to cost them money to keep it.

News flash....it's going to cost us money to get rid of it!  Lots of money.  Not only the money we have to pay back to the federal government (1.6 Billion!!) but the cost of setting up all of those departments that were streamlined and re-hiring people back to implement 2 taxes.

Another thing I find interesting is that the "scrap the HST" debate is largely lead by people with NDP leanings.  People who want (indeed feel entitled)  every social program known to man.  Tell me....how do you expect to pay for all of these things??  Health care, social housing, education, social assistance.  It takes money and the money has got to come from somewhere!

So let's just move on and get this over with quickly.  Use some common sense.........death & taxes....both are certain.......vote NO to getting rid of the HST.  

Oh....and don't forget to actually mail in your ballots if you are in favour of keeping it.  You know the ones who want to get rid of the HST will.  And if you are one of the people who wish to scrap the HST.....feel free to forget your ballot on the counter.  :-)

GermanG

So, you call yourself a driving instructor!

Yesterday was a horrible day.  Me, the driving instructor, ran over the beloved family pet in the driveway!

Before I resume the rest of the story, I will tell you that he is OK.  (Insert sigh of relief here) How do you run over your own dog in your own driveway you ask?

Here's the thing.  For approx. 9 years Bandit has lain in the driveway.  For approx. 9 years, he has always moved when I am backing in or driving out........always! So, walking around the car and looking (as I teach my students) likely would not have changed much that evening, as I would have started the car, thought he would move and then drove off as per usual. Only the "usual" did not occur!

My  son and I left and immediately I noticed that something didn't sound quite right.  As I was slowing down, the dog yelped.  I was instantly sick to my stomach and I realized what I had just done.  I jumped out and screamed for my husband to help.

Here was poor Bandit, trapped under the car.  Thankfully, he was only pinned under the carriage of the vehicle.  I had not actually run over him!   I am sitting on the steps, my son is rubbing my back and I am crying.  (At this point my son says, "This is interesting.  The one who likes the dog the least is crying the most!"  Thank you son....thank you so much for your words of "encouragement")  The hubby comes to the rescue with a hydrolic jack and frees poor Bandit. Off he runs.......I breathe a sigh of relief.  I haven't killed him!

But, he looks at me with eyes that say, "You tried to kill me, I trust you not"!  He retreats to his doghouse  and stares....eyes accusing.  Once again, I am sick to my stomach.  How do you speak to a creature that does not speak your language.  Ah!  I bribe him.  A hotdog, piece of bacon, dog treat......all accepted.....but the accusation doesn't go away.  "I know what you are doing", they say, "but I still don't trust you"!  Will this shame ever end!

Thank goodness a dog's memory is not a lengthy one.    The morning comes and when I let him out of the garage (I should say that I was going to let him sleep in the house, but he wanted to part of being in close proximity of me) he bounds out, the previous day apparently behind him. Yes!  Redemption!

Today all seems well in the pet/owner world.  Though I did notice that when I backed into the driveway........the dog was no where to be seen!

GermanG

Where's the "luck" in potluck??

I dislike potlucks.  Dinner, lunches.......doesn't matter, I am not overly keen on them.  They can be loud, noisy environments in which you have no control over what you can eat and who you are sitting next to.  But, above all else, it's the apparent lack of "potluck etiquette" that drives me nuts!

Let me set the scenario.  The place is packed. There seems to be enough food for everyone.  The table is overflowing, anticipation is in the air as table by table the masses start filing.  I don't really care if I am the first or the last.....I mean, really, what's the rush.  There is plenty of food for all. I chat, I wait and then I look up from my table...........

First off, where are some children's parents??  I was always taught, take a bit of food first, there are others behind you.  You can always go back for 2nds after everyone has had a chance to serve themselves. It's the way I raised my kids.  But then I look again........wait a minute.....would you look at the mound of food.....now I see where Junior gets it from!

Now don't get me wrong, it's not about the food for me.  It's about the etiquette.  I was recently at a well-planned, civilized potluck where everyone behaved themselves and there was plenty of food left over.  I actually find that the smaller the event, the more control.  What agitates me is the apparent "famine mentally" that overtakes some people and the ensuing "scraps" that are left behind for people further down the line.  Like if they don't pile it on now, they will never eat another meal!

The most interesting thing about this is the church potluck.  I will make an open disclaimer that not everyone in the church is like this, but some people have no problem pointing out other peoples sins. Look at so & so......they smoke, or live with someone, or are dating a non-christian (insert any other "sin" that people are so ready to point out) but do they not see that piling food sky high is greed & gluttony.  Last time I looked, that was a sin!

 I guess what I am trying to say is look behind you.  Look at the plate in front of you.  Have concern for your fellow man.  Be respectful and take only what you need.....not what you want before the next guy gets there.  Perhaps if we all did that, then there would be food left over that we could take to a needy family that really could use it!

GermanG

I love my dad

My dad is amazing!  He can be very opinionated (surely where I get it from!) but it's always with love and concern for myself and my family.  And he's is a funny guy.

My dad is the type of person in a crowd that draws the laughs.  He is outgoing and has a great sense of humour, able to pull a punchline out of thin air when needed.  He is also able to laugh at himself.  This is an admirable trait as many people can dish it out, but they cannot take it.  When something funny happens to him, he always says, "Remember this one for the funeral.....I want people to laugh"!

There was this time as a teenager when I reluctantly had to help dear old dad do some chores.  I can't remember the exact details, but I do remember it required him to reach into the back of the truck canopy.  In and out he went passing whatever it was to me, to be dutifully brought into the house.  I do remember that it was morning and his PJ's were on.  After a few trips, I got some crazy idea that I should "pants" dear old dad.  The next reach in.....whip......those PJ's fly to his ankles, having no idea that he wasn't wearing underwear (I am still a bit scarred from that vision).  Dad hits his head on the top of the canopy and then topples in forward so now he's kind of stuck there, balls to the breeze.  I am in hysterics rolling around on the driveway.......the effect was more than I could have hoped for.  Dad was not impressed.  Some weeks later he was able to chuckle.  Shortly after our neighbors directly across the street split up.   To this day dad blames the "pantsing" incident saying that once his wife got a look at a real man, she just couldn't stay with her husband.  LOL

The other thing that comes to mind is a recent camping trip we went on where dad brought a starter pistol to use as a bear banger on their walks.  It was loud and it was effective and our dog did not like the noise of it. After supper one day the hubby and dad decide to take another stroll.  The sun was still out so my daughter and I decide to get some last minute rays by the water.  We hear a shot, the dog comes back.......nothing.  About a half hour later my daughter asks if we should be concerned that we heard gunfire and no one has returned.  Give it a bit I say....besides we have about an hour of sun left. 

Sure enough they return, but dad and the hubby are chuckling the whole way.  You tell them, dad says.  Apparently, as the story goes,dad had blanks and tear gas canisters for the starter pistol.  He was unaware that he had grabbed a tear gas canister.  Out comes a bear, dad shoots and a puff of bluish smoke wafts in his direction.  The hubby wonders what is going on as dad drops to the ground writhing in pain, tears streaming from his eyes.  Dad recovers and starts marveling at his stupidity, filling in the blanks for Gene.  Once again, a directive is given that this one must make it into the story books for the funeral!

I believe I have my dad's sense of humor and the ability to laugh at myself.  I think it's a wonderful trait to inherit and will not only honor dad's wishes when (in hopefully what will be quite a few years) he passes, but request my family to do the same.

I love my dad.

German G